It was only a dream

Every wish on my pray I asked to Allah to guide me to my wedding, I asked to Allah to show is he really the one for me?

I ever dream of him, in our 4 years relationship, he often comes to my dreams because he’s part of my world now, but after I get up in the morning, I never remember what I’m dream of, what he’s doing in my dream, I just can remember he was there in my dreams.

And only two dreams about him that I am able to remember every detail about it , and it was you there…

The first one is, we are in the green garden, in the afternoon maybe and it was a beautiful day, clear sky, we are sitting in the park bench, I put my head into his shoulder and we are holding hands. We are not talking, we just sitting and enjoy the afternoon. The smooth wind… yaa.. I can feel it. And that was the most comfortable feeling I ever felt with him. At moment, I feel very pleasant, cozy, nice, warm and comfortable. Very very comfortable it was, I remember that feeling very well , even until I open my eyes and realize it was night, I was lay on my bed and it was only dreams, but I can still remember the kind of feeling that I have in that dreams..that was very beautiful feeling, and I really hope I can feel that feeling in my real world.. so beautiful and so comfortable..

The second is, in that dream I already have boyfriend and my boyfriend in my dream is not my boyfriend in my real world (he is not bagus), I don’t know who is it, I’m not seeing that person. It was late night, after an event is over, I will be going home. And my boyfriend in there too, but because a lot of people in there we didn’t together, my boyfriend was very careless and annoying, he didn’t call to asked where I’m now and when I will be going home. And since my egoistic is there too, I will not gonna phone him first, If he didn’t take care of me, I can take care myself.

With all the hopeless feeling, I go home by myself, I walked out from the venue, it was night and dark. I step my foot in the dark. After a minute, a car come close to me, kind of Daihatsu espas which have a sliding door, and I find bagus mother and bagus brother in there, their offer a ride home for me. Oke I take it, I got into the car. Inside the car, bagus mother’s asked me where is my boyfriend?, why I am alone at this night?, I just answer I can’t find him when I want to go home, So I go home by myself.

And after that my phone is ringing, it was my boyfriend, asked me where I’m, because he can’t find me at the venue, I answered that I’m on my way to going home with bagus mother and brother. My boyfriend asked me to stop and get off from that car and wait him in the intersection, he is still in the venue and will gonna pick me up soon. Oke even though he was careless but I have feeling for him, I will be very happy If he can ride me to home and even tough it is very dangerous for me to stay alone in the dark night. So I stop and get off the car. Yaa in the outside was dark and cold. And I have to walk approximately one kilometer to reach the intersection with my two hands are full of heavy plastic bag.

On my way to the intersection, my phone is ringing again. It was bagus (at my dream, he was only my best friend), he is in his car, he asked where I’m and he wants to give me a ride too. I say I was on my way to intersection and bagus say he is nearly close to the intersection so please go with him and he will take me home safely, it is really dangerous for me to stay alone in the dark any longer. I got confused, I have a careless boyfriend that I love so much that on his way to pick me up, and on the other side, there is my best friend (bagus) who will always there and help me every time I need something. And Bagus distance was closer than my boyfriend distance to pick me out from the dark night and drive me home safely. And I’m still not sure if my boyfriend will get me soon or he still talking with people in the venue. At the time I was crying and questioning how stupid I was, I love the careless man, who is very cold to me, and I don’t realize that I have a man who always there for help me, and the  man is bagus. I’m at the moment ensuring myself to go home with bagus and ignored my careless boyfriend. I still convince my self that bagus is my right decision.

I don’t know the end of my dreams, and I don’t know who is finally I chose to go home with…

I already wake up, open my eyes because at sudden I feel I got the stomachache and I need to go the bathroom 😀


Every details that I wrote is based a real story that happened in my dream..


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